![]() ![]() ![]() Moreover, you’re still having sex with her, and while condoms may reduce the risk of HPV transmission, they hardly eliminate it. Maybe you gave it to her! Then what? More contemporaneous partners may increase the risk, statistically speaking, but if she’s already had an active sex life thus far, a few more partners aren’t going to move the needle that much. It’s a highly contagious virus, and it’s estimated that 80 percent of people will have some strain of it at some point in their lives. This woman may have already been carrying HPV when you started seeing her. Sorry to say this tracks in the overall context of your letter. This stuff is massively difficult to navigate, especially between two people whose views on these matters don’t necessarily align. I don’t think he’s telling the whole truth about his outside desires, but maybe he feels that to do so would be to further jeopardize the repair of your union, especially in its current, brittle state. I can’t say for sure how devoted your husband is to saving your marriage, but he is giving you tangible evidence that he’s committed to rebuilding a gratifying sex life in the form of daily banging. Taste and desires don’t evaporate when people commit to a monogamous partner they just learn how to manage them. His interest in others doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with you. I don’t believe him, either, about being “over the trans attraction,” but here’s where we differ: I don’t think it makes much of a difference. Is trans attraction “baked in”? Can you ever be “over it”? He was with her for two years! I can’t find any help online. I believe he is scared to explore his sexuality in fear that it will upend his lifestyle. (We’ve been having daily sex for about a month now.) I don’t believe him. Now, miraculously, he says he’s over the trans attraction and says it can’t fulfill him. He landed his model on the first try, or so he says. He admitted to getting turned on by trans porn for the past five years, and one day when I was out of town, he went to a trans party at a gay bar to make it real. He had a two-year-long secret love affair with her, seeing her twice a week. Finally this week, starting our fourth month on this, he told me his young model is trans. Three months into trying to recover from all this with the help of a therapist and figure out how or if to rebuild our marriage-he emphatically wants to, but I am still hurt to the core-I still felt that I wasn’t getting the full story. ![]()
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